No matter how cynical I’m feeling about the world, when the Olympics come round every fourth year I get fired up. Those athletes living out their dreams on my TV gets me shouting USA, USA, USA!

Sure, their stories of sacrifice and triumph can seem cliche. But don’t you love seeing hard work get rewarded on the world stage like I do? Of course you do. Just make sure you don’t compare yourself to them, because it’s just not fair.

Olympians have huge advantages over you.

They have incredible athletic genes. You’re built for comfort, not speed. They look good in skin-tight spandex no retail clerk should ever be allowed to sell you. And besides their natural talents, Olympians have four huge advantages over us Manic Impressives.

1) Super Successful Parents – No offense, but your parents are kind of lame compared to the parents of Olympians. These parents get up early to take their kids to practice, work two jobs to pay for gear, and are disciplined, motivated role models.

Many are stud athletes like Michele Carter’s dad. Michele was the first American woman to win gold in the shot put since 1948. Her dad Michael Carter won the silver in shot put back in 1984, then won 3 Super Bowl rings with the San Francisco Forty Niners.

Your dad’s got a league bowling trophy, does he? Sorry, not in the same galaxy. Stop embarrassing yourself. Continue reading 4 Advantages Olympians Have Over You And Why It’s Okay →